Sick of control
by Kerriss
Summary: Kurt doesn't want to lose weight, he wants control and what better way to get it then controlling your food. Will Blaine be able to stop him before he goes too far? This is my first attempt at fanfiction so please be nice! Also I don't own any of the characters or Glee, sadly. Warning - Eating disorder
1. Chapter 1

"Arrrghh, missed again!" yelled Nick with a giggle as he frantically pressed buttons on the controller.

It was a Warblers get together playing Call of Duty and Nick was currently playing against Thad who was definitely getting the better of the blonde boy. There were currently 12 of the 15 Warblers crammed into Blaine's dorm room, it being one of the largest ones, sitting on any surface they could find.

Admitting defeat Nick turned to Blaine, "Your turn," and handed over the controller before he climbed into Blaine's space next to Kurt on the bed. Blaine was playing Jeff, Nick's boyfriend, and it looked like being a long match. Bowls of popcorn and chips were working their way round the room and empty soda cans littered the floor.

Kurt's attention was directed at the screen as he watched Blaine's character jump around, being chased by Jeff. As the match drew to an end Jeff threw himself on top of Nick and Kurt shouting, "Hugs for the champion," before chuckling madly. The two boys fell back from their position at the side of the bed laughing as Jeff's weight pressed them down on the mattress.

"Oi, you can do what you want with your boyfriend in bed but leave mine out of it!" shouted Blaine with a grin as he pushed Jeff off Kurt and helped him off the bed. "Sorry but it looks like I'm a loser," he said drawing Kurt into a deep kiss.

"That's OK, it just means you're around to do this with for longer," and Kurt gently kissed his lips before deepening it. "Besides I was knocked out in the first round so what does that make me," and he kissed Blaine's lips again gently.

"Aww, cute guys but the tournament is just hotting up and you two making out is distracting me," joked Thad as he took up his place with the controllers again.

"Yeah, go get a room," laughed Nick from his position on the bed, still under Jeff who seems to be quite happy to keep him there.

"Very happy to get a room guys, oh no wait **this** is my room so you can all just shove off while Kurt and I have all the fun," Blaine replied kissing Kurt along the jaw line and taking a friendly swipe at Thad.

Declaring a fifteen minute break so everyone can, in Wes' words, finish their make out sessions and cool down the guys all wander around getting new sodas, visiting the bathroom etc and just before the next round starts a couple of pizza menus start going round. "Have a look guys and if there is anything particular you want let me know in the next five minutes, if not we'll just get the normal order to share," said Wes before heading over to the desk to grab a notepad and pen.

Grabbing one of the menus as it went past Blaine handed it to Kurt, "what do you fancy?"

"Am I allowed to say you," came the reply along with a kiss.

Blaine pulled back in surprise, Kurt wasn't usually this flirty. His hesitance was marked by Kurt snaking his hand round the back of his neck to pull him in for another deep kiss, pushing his tongue into Blaine's parted lips. After a few moments Blaine pulled away, while they were in a room filled with their friends the fact Blaine's jeans were starting to feel rather tight was not lost on him and he really couldn't throw everyone out just so he could be with Kurt.

"Erm, are you OK?" he said rather breathlessly.

"Sorry, just got carried away for a moment there," Kurt replied gently brushing his thumb along Blaine's lower lip. Deciding Blaine needed a moment Kurt whispered in his ear, "I'll go get us some more sodas."

Placing the pizza menu on his lap to cover any embarrassment Blaine watched as Kurt sashayed over to the cooler in the corner of the room. As he bent to get some cans out Blaine was painfully aware of how perfectly fitted those skinny jeans were and how much he would love to rip them off. He also suspected that Kurt was playing a game with him, trying to see how far he could push him in a room full of their friends and he was not going to give in.

Kurt had already moaned that morning about the get together and more importantly why it always had to be in Blaine's room. They had just returned from Thanksgiving break and as they had both been with their families they hadn't seen each other for 5 days. Once back at Dalton they had both had so much homework and group presentations to work on that the most time they had had to be alone was an hour on Wednesday after dinner, before Kurt left to work on a French presentation. They were both getting impatient but at least today they were together and now they were both out of the competition they could just relax and enjoy being around each other and their friends. Besides the next day was Sunday and they could spend all day in bed, even if they had to study at least it would just be them.

A drip of ice cold water running down his cheek woke Blaine from his day dream and Kurt laughed as he sat down next to him and handed over the sprite. "Having fun down there were you?" he said grinning like a Cheshire Cat as he nodded towards the menu.

"So that was your little plan," Blaine replied wiping the water off his cheek. "I have amazing self control you know," as he handed the menu over to Wes with a flourish.

"Oh I know all about your control," Kurt whispered slowly in his ear, "but I also saw you checking out my ass!"

"Are you trying to kill me?" Blaine answered, almost pleading, "because this is cruel."

Laughing gently Kurt put his hand on Blaine's thigh and began to move his fingers up and down, "Well then let's go to my room."

"No!" Blaine said bluntly and then continued as Kurt pulled away hurt, "It's not that I don't want to but I don't trust all these guys in here without me. It's my stuff Kurt and the last time quite a few things got damaged. I'm sorry but I'll make it up to you tomorrow, I promise."

With a quick kiss on the lips Kurt replied, "OK, your room, your rules," before he turned his attention back to the next round of the computer game competition.

Moments later Nick leaned over to Blaine and handed him one of the bowls of popcorn. Blaine nodded thanks and scooped out a few pieces before passing it on to Kurt who immediately handed it over to David who was next to him. Blaine offered Kurt some from his hand but he shook his head and his eyes returned to the screen.

The room was pretty quiet with occasional shouts as shots were missed but the game was really intense and no one wanted to miss any action. The snack bowls kept moving round and each time it reached Blaine and Kurt, the countertenor passed it on without having anything.

"Are you not hungry?" asked Blaine eventually. It had been a long time since lunch and he knew all Kurt had eaten then was a bowl of soup.

"No I'm waiting on the pizza," Kurt whispered without looking away from the screen. With a sigh Blaine turned his attention back to the game.

After two more rounds they were about to start the semi finals when Wes got a phone call to say the pizzas were downstairs. Kurt offered to go and help him bring them up and as soon as they entered the room the other Warblers descended on them like starving animals. Blaine grabbed himself a couple of slices of pepperoni and sat back down expecting Kurt to come back over but Nick came over instead and they got into the regular Katy Perry versus Lady Gaga debate. By the time Blaine had finished the pizza Nick had exhausted all the usual arguments in favour of Lady Gaga and decided to go and annoy Thad with a similar debate.

Standing up to look round Blaine realised he couldn't see Kurt anywhere. He had definitely come back in with the pizzas but he hadn't seen him since then. Blaine asked David and Jeff, neither of whom had seen him but by this time Wes was announcing that the competition had to start again if they were going to be finished by curfew. Deciding Kurt must have gone to the bathroom Blaine settled down to watch Thad take on Charlie in what became a brutal match.

As the second semi final began with Jeff taking on Mark, Blaine looked up to see Kurt sitting over by the door. The look on his face frightened Blaine but he couldn't say why. Kurt's brows were furrowed and his mouth twisted as if someone had given him something unpleasant to taste. The more Blaine looked the more he realised Kurt looked sad, unhappy and without the spark that Blaine loved so much. He made his way over to where his boyfriend was sitting and slid down the wall to be next to him.

"Hey, everything alright?" he asked quietly.

Kurt blinked several times as if to pull himself from a trance before replying, "Fine, why?"

"I couldn't find you and now you're sitting here all alone."

"I got a call from Mercedes, I slipped out to talk to her that's all."

"Is she alright?"

"Fine, what's with all the questions?" Kurt snapped at Blaine getting irritated with the interrogation.

"Sorry, you just seemed very distracted," Blaine's hand moved towards Kurt and then he thought the better of it.

They sat in an uncomfortable silence for a few minutes before Blaine said, "Did you get some pizza?"

"Yes, I had some before I left," the reply came too quick, too snappy for Blaine's liking and then he knew why Kurt had left the room.

"Hey, don't get mad, I'm just looking out for you."

"I'm not a baby Blaine, I can look after myself. In fact I'm so good at knowing what I need, I think it's time I went to bed." Leaning down to give Blaine a quick peck on the cheek Kurt left leaving his boyfriend confused and worried.

Nick quickly appeared at Blaine's side, watching in sympathy as the hazel eyes tried to blink back tears. Without saying anything Nick reached over and pulled Blaine into a gentle hug. "Want to talk about it?" he asked gently.

Shaking his head Blaine replied, "He's just tired, he wanted to go to bed."

"Well you know I'm here if you change your mind. Cheer up, last round and then you can get your room back."

Once most of the Warblers left Jeff and Nick stayed back to help Blaine tidy up. "How come Kurt got out of this?" moaned Jeff, his mood ruined by having lost the final to Thad.

"Oh he left about half an hour ago," muttered Blaine while Nick stood behind hitting his head and mouthing 'idiot' at Jeff.

"Sorry, I was engrossed in the competition, I hadn't realised. Is he OK? I sort of assumed he was staying here tonight."

"Honestly Jeff, foot in mouth, please shut up" muttered Nick in his ear. Jeff looked at his boyfriend in confusion, he had no idea what was happening.

"It's fine Nick," said Blaine quietly. "We had a bit of a disagreement and he went off to his own room, that's all," he continued but the half smile at the end wasn't fooling anyone.

Nick went over to hug his friend, "Don't worry, it will all have been forgotten by the morning and then you can spend all day together," he pulled Jeff's hand to get him out of the room but as he did Jeff nudged Blaine and announced, "Yes, and making up is always the best part of an argument!"

Blaine closed his dorm door behind them and lay face up on his bed. He really wished this was just a small quarrel but it had been going on for almost a month and Blaine was becoming increasingly concerned about Kurt's health.


	2. Chapter 2

**Huge thanks to everyone who has made this story their favourite, it means a lot. I have the next few chapters already written but need to edit some bits before publishing. I'd love to know what people think so please review especially as I have a few other stories partially written and I'm not sure whether to start publishing them.**

It had started one Tuesday afternoon, Kurt had been home for the weekend and then Mondays were always homework heavy but they usually managed a bit of time together on a Tuesday evening. Blaine had gone to the library after class as usual as he and Kurt would meet up to study there before dinner but there was no sign of Kurt. After 30 minutes Blaine sent him a text and then again after another 15 minutes. It was not like Kurt to be late but even less like him not to reply to a message so Blaine texted Jeff who had politics with him last period.

_I can't find Kurt, any idea where he was going after class? B_

**He only managed 5 minutes of class before he ran out, looks like he got this sickness bug. J**

_Thanks, guess I'll check the nurse then. B_

Blaine packed up his books and made his way down to the medical rooms, the nurse confirmed that Kurt was there but was not leaving for a while and couldn't have visitors ("I've enough students down with this sickness bug without inviting anymore in!") Annoyed not to be able to see his boyfriend but understanding the reason Blaine sent Kurt a quick text (_I heard you're sick, I'll bring you some soup when you are up to it )_ before heading over to his dorm to finish some more homework.

Kurt had been kept in the medical suite overnight as he was continuing to vomit, finally stopping around 2am. The nurse was particularly concerned about him becoming dehydrated and so wanted to make sure he kept drinking the rehydration solution. He woke hearing the warning bell just before 8.30 and once the corridors cleared of students the nurse helped him over to his dorm. He was still very weak so she stayed in the bedroom while he had a shower and changed into pyjamas and then helped him into bed. She left, giving him strict instructions to drink the rehydration liquid regularly and that she would be back over in the afternoon to check on him. Kurt managed to send Blaine a quick text (_Back in dorm, going to sleep.) _before letting exhaustion take over.

At lunchtime Blaine grabbed a sandwich for himself and a plain bagel for Kurt and headed to the dorms. He knocked gently at Kurt's door but got no response. Figuring he was still asleep Blaine headed to his own room to start some homework while he ate his sandwich, he left the bagel on his desk so he could give it to Kurt later.

Nurse Stephens came over around two to check on Kurt and using her own key to open the door frowned as she saw a full glass of juice sitting on the bedside table and the young boy fast asleep. He clearly hadn't drunk anything all morning and she had to wake him gently and make him drink. With 'threats' that she would be back later to check again she left Kurt to drift back off to sleep.

Kurt did manage to drink more across the afternoon but still felt very weak and was quite happy when Nurse Stephens announced during her visit before dinner that he was to stay off class the next day too.

After dinner Blaine came back to see Kurt, he had tried again after school but the young boy had been asleep again. "Hey, how are you feeling?" Blaine asked cautiously taking in the dark, tired eyes and hair sticking in every direction.

"_I've been better!"_

"Oh poor baby," said Blaine gently brushing his fingers through Kurt's hair. "Are you hungry? Do you want me to get you some more juice?"

Before Kurt could answer the door opened and Nurse Stephens walked in. "Blaine, back to your own room. I do not need anymore students down with this virus!" Giving Kurt a quick peck on the cheek and a whispered 'I'll text you' Blaine left his boyfriend in the nurse's care before heading back to his own dorm to finish his English essay.

On Thursday morning Blaine was just getting dressed when he got a message from Kurt. 'Got to stay in bed one more day , please can you visit after class.'

_I'll do better, I'll bring you some lunch._

Kurt slept most of the morning but by the time Blaine arrived at lunchtime he was definitely feeling a bit brighter.

"Hey, you've changed and you're sitting up," Blaine said with a smile and a quick kiss.

"Yeah, I had a shower and changed and actually feel a lot better."

"Here, I brought you some soup, I thought that might be easy enough for you to eat," Blaine sat down at Kurt's desk after handing him the plastic container and a spoon. Kurt smiled at his wonderfully thoughtful boyfriend as Blaine took a bite out of his sandwich.

"So tell me what I've missed," said the young boy as he put the soup on his nightstand and took a sip of water. Blaine took a deep breath and told Kurt all about Wes and David's antics at the Warbler's rehearsal the previous day. He was about to tell Kurt about the mini explosion that Thad had allegedly caused in chemistry when he noticed the soup.

"You should really eat some soup while it's still hot, you need to get your strength back," he said gently.

"I know but my stomach is still kind of in knots and I don't want to tempt fate. I'll stick with water just now but I really appreciate the thought." Kurt suddenly noticed the time on his alarm clock, "You'd better go, the warning bell is about to go."

Gently kissing his forehead and giving him clear instructions to rest and please try a little soup Blaine left the junior curled up under his duvet about to watch another movie.

As Blaine walked into Warbler's practice that afternoon Jeff and Nick immediately descended on him asking how Kurt was. "He's feeling a lot better and should be back tomorrow."

At dinner Blaine picked up a small plate of pasta and vegetables to take over in the hope that Kurt would try some. When he got to his dorm Jeff was sitting on the bed telling Kurt about his weekend plans with Nick. Blaine walked in, put the pasta on the desk and removed his blazer before going to sit next to Kurt on his bed.

"Hi," he said kissing the top of Kurt's head lightly.

"Well now your prince is here I'll leave you to his care. Get a good night's sleep, I need my biology partner back," said Jeff with a grin, closing the door gently as he left.

"How are you feeling?"

"Definitely better. The nurse came over this afternoon and said I can go back to classes tomorrow, oh joy a whole week's work to catch up on!"

"What are you doing at the weekend? I'm not sure you should drive all the way home after a full day of school when you've been ill for the last three days."

Kurt giggled, "Well thank you Doctor Anderson for your diagnosis. You will be pleased to know that I spoke with my dad this morning and he agrees with you so I will be staying here this weekend."

"Good, we can lie around and watch lots of movies."

"Or do lots of make up work!" Kurt said with a frown.

"Don't worry, the teachers will give you extensions and quite a few people including the teachers have been down with this virus so no one will expect you to have finished everything by Monday morning." Looking around the room Blaine suddenly remembered dinner, "here, I brought you some pasta and vegetables, I figured you wouldn't make it downstairs."

"Thanks but I really don't think I can eat anything yet, I'll try some later."

Blaine put the plastic plate back on the desk noticing that the soup from lunch was still in the same position on the night stand. He wasn't happy about it but he knew these sickness bugs could really play havoc with your stomach so he left the matter alone for the evening.

The two boys curled up on Kurt's bed and watched a movie before Blaine decided that Kurt was yawning so much that he should get plenty of sleep before returning to class the next day. Planting a gentle kiss on Kurt's forehead Blaine whispered, "Sleep tight baby" and couldn't help smile at the fact the chestnut haired boy was clearly asleep before Blaine had even reached the door.


	3. Chapter 3

**Shorter chapter today but it was the best way to break it up. Thanks for all the lovely feedback and if anyone has any prompts or feedback I'd love to hear it.**

On Friday morning Blaine woke up feeling happier than he had all week. Kurt was going to be back in class and while they didn't have many lessons together he would get to see him at break times not to mention the fact he was staying at Dalton over the weekend. Getting showered and dressed quickly Blaine wandered down to Kurt's room to get him for breakfast as they did every day.

It took a few knocks before Kurt finally opened the door and he looked very surprised to see Blaine standing there. "Not that it's not lovely to see you but why are you here, there's ages before class?"

"I thought we could go down to breakfast, you know, like we do every morning," Blaine's voice trailed off as he finished the sentence.

"Oh…. right… breakfast," Kurt said hesitantly.

"C'mon finish getting ready and we can go." Blaine walked into Kurt's dorm shutting the door behind him. As he sat down on the bed he frowned seeing Kurt still standing by the door, frozen. "You OK? Are you not feeling well again?"

"No, no I'm fine, just trying to think what I have this morning." Kurt walked over to his desk and started to put books in his bag before taking half of them out again. With a deep sigh he turned to face Blaine, "Look I'm not going to be ready for a while yet, why don't you go over and I'll see you in English."

"Kurt," Blaine said as gently as possible, reaching to take one of his hands, "What's the matter?"

"Nothing," he laughed slowly. "I guess I'm just worried about having to catch up on everything"

"People get sick all the time, no one will expect you to be up to date. Now stop worrying and get your books." He walked over to the desk and handed Kurt his copy of 'Of Mice and Men' for English lit. Kurt went to open his mouth again but Blaine got there first, "Kurt, I am waiting for you, you are coming to breakfast. I don't care how little you eat but you need to have something." With that he leaned forward and gently kissed him on the lips.

"OK, let me just find my history book."

Breakfast that day was a very strange event as far as Kurt was concerned. First it took him ages to decide what he actually thought he could stomach and having decided on a small fruit salad and some orange juice he could feel his heart racing at the thought of actually eating. He had got used to the gentle ache of hunger in his stomach, there was something strangely comforting about it but he knew Blaine would not let him go to class without eating something.

He picked up his tray and went to sit at the Warbler's table and was overwhelmed at the welcome he received. People hugged him, said how good it was to have him back, patted him on the back and numerous other ways of showing him that he had been missed. He would never have admitted to Blaine that he was nervous to be among the group again but he hadn't known them that long and there had been part of him scared that they might have been relieved to get a break from him.

Blaine sat down next to him as the Warblers moved back to their seats and immediately began a conversation with Nick who was sitting opposite. Kurt tried to follow what they were talking about but clearly he had missed some announcement about a test so he turned his attention to talk to Thad who was on his other side. They were having an interesting debate about superhero costumes and the fashion behind them when Kurt felt a hand squeeze his knee. Jumping slightly he turned his head towards Blaine who was wearing his little grim smile again.

Leaning forward to whisper in his ear Blaine said, "I know I said you didn't have to eat much but you do need to eat something." And pointed very definitely at Kurt's untouched fruit and orange juice.

"Sorry Dad," Kurt said with a grin and took a sip of the cold juice. He picked up his fork and opened the fruit salad and lifted up a slice of apple, before looking at it and deciding he really didn't want it. He put his fork back down and examined the fruit in the bowl trying to think what he potentially could choke down before taking another drink of juice. Nothing appealed to him and the thought of swallowing food made him feel nauseous. So he ended up just stirring the fruit around in an aimless fashion hoping that Blaine wouldn't notice he hadn't actually eaten.

Jeff was sitting opposite him and Kurt asked what he had missed in history. Jeff started talking when Kurt felt Blaine squeeze his knee again and nod towards the fruit, clearly it hadn't escaped his notice that there was still the same amount in the bowl as there had been at the start. Just at that moment the warning bell rang and everyone started to clear their trays ready for the first class. Jeff and Nick headed down the corridor towards history but as Kurt went to follow them Blaine grabbed his hand and pulled him back.

Looking at the deep hazel eyes and the frown line between them Kurt knew Blaine was cross. "Are you still feeling sick again because if you are you should go see the nurse."

"No, I feel a lot better this morning, I told you that."

"So why didn't you eat anything? You haven't eaten for almost a week Kurt, it's not healthy."

"Thanks for the medical advice, now if that's all I need to get to history before I get detention for being late." Kurt pulled his hand firmly from Blaine's grip and stomped off. It wasn't that he hadn't tried to eat but everything made him feel sick, he hoped his appetite would have returned by lunch because there was no way Blaine would let him avoid eating then.


	4. Chapter 4

**A shorter chapter this time but this and the next chapter are very focussed on Kurt's emotions and how everything builds within him. It makes sense to me so I hope it does to everyone else. **

History was excruciating as Kurt had to concentrate so much harder than normal. He had missed three lessons but it felt like more and then Jeff and Nick kept giggling away in front of him, it was all just winding him up. At the back of his mind was the fact he had English Lit with Blaine second period and he just knew it was going to end in another fight. He knew because he was fed up listening to Blaine, fed up with his boyfriend telling him what to do all the time. The more he thought about it the more riled up he became, he wanted to prove a point, he wanted to show Blaine that he, Kurt Hummel, could make decisions and he didn't need to follow the rules of the great Blaine Anderson all the time. There was a small nagging voice quietly whispering 'Blaine loves you and just wants you to be healthy' but the louder voices were screaming 'why are you letting your boyfriend control you'. By the time he got to English the louder voices were most definitely winning!

Arriving at English Kurt went straight over to the teacher, he had to collect the work he had missed and then he slowly walked over to the desk he shared with Blaine. The dark haired boy looked up as Kurt placed his bag on the desk and smiled warmly, "How's your morning going?"

He wanted to complain about how hard he had worked in history, he wanted to say that he had a ridiculous amount of make up work for three days absence, he wanted to say he was sorry about snapping that morning but instead all he could do was mutter, "It's fine" before sitting down and taking out his notebook.

Blaine looked carefully at Kurt, he could feel the tension streaming off his body but his short answer also told Blaine that he was still angry about the morning. He had never been so thankful for a teacher to begin the lesson.

By lunch Kurt's mood had not improved, if anything it had darkened further. He had Home Economics right before lunch and was glad that they were in the middle of a sewing unit, while cooking usually relaxed him he didn't think it would have had the desired effect that morning. When the bell rang he took his time putting everything away while he decided his next move.

Was he angry with Blaine for caring about him or trying to boss him around? Either way the thought of going into the dining hall, being faced with all that food and noise and chaos made him feel physically sick so grabbing his bag he made a snap decision and went back to his dorm. Closing the door to everything he felt himself finally calm and he slumped down behind the door taking deep breaths.

After several minutes he walked over to his desk and pulled out a granola bar. He had decided that he was hungry, just not very hungry but after taking the first bite he found himself spitting it out feeling terribly sick again. The small logical part of his brain was telling him he was building it all up into a big anxiety event and he just needed to get over his panic, food was not evil but again the louder part of his brain was screaming about how he shouldn't eat as he'd get fat, memories of taunts, 'pear hips', trousers that he couldn't fit into all came swimming back into his mind.

He was abruptly roused from his internal battle by his phone. Knowing before he looked that it was Blaine calling he noticed 3 earlier text messages all from his boyfriend. The first sent just during 1st lesson simply said, 'I'm sorry.' The next was sent while he was in home economics, 'I hate not talking to you.' And the final one was sent about 10 minutes into lunch break, 'Please come to the dining hall, I miss you.' With a sad sigh Kurt cancelled the call and deleted the messages, he wasn't sure why but it made him feel better, more in control. He moved over to his desk and made a start on his history homework.

Meanwhile in the dining hall Blaine looked miserably at his phone. The call hadn't gone to Kurt's voicemail which meant he had cancelled it. He was aware that Wes was speaking to him, he could hear chatter all around him but couldn't bring himself to focus on any of it as his hand mechanically brought his fork up to his mouth and then back to the plate. His eyes repeatedly darted towards the door and the cafeteria area hoping to see his boyfriend but he knew deep down that Kurt wasn't coming.

After ten minutes Blaine couldn't stand it anymore. He told Wes that whatever he wanted to do was fine, having not listened to any of the conversation he had no idea whether they had been talking about songs for Sectionals or suits for the Winter Ball and he didn't care. Excusing himself from the table Blaine quickly cleared his tray and headed over to the dorms to find Kurt.

Kurt was aimlessly flipping through pages in his history textbook hoping that inspiration would hit him but really just happy the flicking motion was creating a breeze which was keeping him awake. The morning's classes had really exhausted him and he was thinking about how he would like nothing better than to lie down when he was brought back to reality by a knock at the door.

Opening it slowly he wasn't really surprised to see Blaine standing there, arms crossed and lips pursed. Immediately Kurt felt his anger rising again. "Shouldn't you be at lunch with your friends," the words were out before he even thought about it.

"_I was at lunch but one of my friends was missing, in fact my most important friend didn't appear and I'm wondering why?"_

Blaine stepped into the room, closing the door behind himself as Kurt stomped back over to his desk. Picking up his pen he began writing, anything really, he just needed to be engaged in an activity. Sitting on the edge of Kurt's bed Blaine watched silently for a moment before he moved over to the desk and knelt next to the taller boy. Gently reaching forward he took the pen out of his hand and put it back in the pot. Holding both Kurt's hands Blaine led him over to the bed and turned so they could clearly look at each other.

"What's going on Kurt?" he was trying to keep his voice soft and caring but couldn't stop it wavering as he spoke.

"_Nothing, I just wanted peace to get on with my work. I told you I have a lot to make up."_

"Spending 15 minutes to eat lunch isn't going to impact your work that much." The hazel eyes were sparking with tears as Blaine whispered, "you will make yourself ill if you keep skipping meals."

Kurt tried to look away, but he couldn't. Blaine knew how to make him listen and seeing his boyfriend visibly upset was not something he could ignore. He could feel himself blushing scarlet, the rational part of his mind telling him Blaine was right but then the now familiar rage kicked in and rather than apologising Kurt found himself yelling.

"_You always think you know best, I'm sick of it. It's one meal Blaine, it's not going to hurt me. Why do you always have to be so dramatic!" _With that Kurt grabbed his bag off the floor and stormed off to his next class leaving the dark haired boy staring at the door trying to work out what just happened.

…

By the time Kurt arrived at his French class he actually felt calmer, almost proud of himself and it was a strange feeling. Yes he had shouted at Blaine which he felt guilty about but he hadn't given in. He was a few minutes early for class so he took the time to reflect on why he was happy. I made a choice, I didn't want to have lunch and I stuck to it, I didn't lose control and let anyone else decide for me.

At that moment the teacher arrived along with the other students and Kurt reached into his bag to get his French book. As he did so he felt the now familiar gentle twinge of hunger reassuring him that this was his choice and with a smile on his face he looked up at the teacher ready to begin.

…..

Blaine sat down on Kurt's bed with a thud, head in his hands and tears tricking down his cheeks. Yesterday, hell even that morning he had been so happy to have Kurt better and back with him and then all they had done was fight. Was it even fighting? Blaine looked to the door, hoping that a pair of beautiful blue eyes would peek round the corner and he could gather his boyfriend in his arms and all was forgotten but he knew that wasn't going to happen.

As he made his way over to his chemistry class Blaine decided he would leave Kurt alone for the time being. He hated when Kurt was mad at him, they didn't fight often but when they did it usually blew over quickly and he knew trying to push the younger boy into doing something he didn't want was asking for trouble. Like Kurt said it was only one meal, Blaine ignored the argument that it had been three days while he was sick, then breakfast and lunch. As he took his place at the science bench Blaine just hoped that by dinner Kurt would feel well enough to eat.


	5. Chapter 5

**Sorry for the delay in posting but I was having real trouble with this chapter (and the next one) but I think I'm back on track. A few more reviews would help point me in the right direction though : ) Just a reminder that I do not own Glee or any on the characters.**

There was no Warbler practice on a Friday afternoon to allow any boys going home the chance to get away early so Kurt made his way over to his dorm after classes. Dropping his bag by the door he looked round noticing his homework from lunchtime sitting in a neat pile in the middle of his desk and the blanket on his bed folded on the pillow. Taking off his tie with a grin he realised that Blaine had tried to straighten up the room before he left and then the smile fell as he remembered just how he had stormed out while accusing the older boy of being dramatic.

After changing out of his uniform into his comfortable skinny jeans and a fitted T-shirt he took out his phone and accepting that he had been wrong so he had to make the first move he sent Blaine a text.

**Sorry about lunchtime. Please don't be mad with me. K xxx**

A moment later he got a reply,

**I'm not mad, just worried. B xxx**

**Don't be, I'm fine. K xxx**

**I'm here if you need me, see you at dinner. B xxx**

Damn it, why does life revolve around bloody meals in this place, Kurt thought throwing himself on his bed. There were two hours until dinner and Kurt knew he had two choices, either go and try to eat something or hide out again and end up fighting with Blaine again.

After a few moments Kurt decided he would go to dinner, he could make the choice of what to eat and he had to admit that the hunger pains in his stomach were not as comforting now, he was starting to feel quite ill. Grabbing a bottle of water from his room fridge and switching his i-pod on shuffle mode he set about completing some homework before he had to go to the dining hall.

Having managed to finish all his French homework Kurt glanced across at his alarm clock and realised that dinner started ten minutes ago. He was surprised not to have heard from Blaine again but when he looked at his phone he realised he had missed two messages.

The first one read **Still in the library with Wes, we'll go straight to dinner from here. B xxx**

The second simply said **Please x**. Kurt's heart sank as he read the second message, Blaine clearly thought he was avoiding another meal, the simplicity of the text said more than one hundred words could have. Grabbing his keys and phone Kurt made his way across the courtyard towards the dining hall happy to pick his own pace and focus on his thoughts.

His thoughts as he actually reached the dining hall changed again as his anxiety level grew. Surrounded by the noise from all the boys, the trays of different food and his fear over seeing Blaine made his heart beat fast and he was aware of a stabbing pain in his chest as he tried to take deep breaths. He wanted to vomit and turned to leave the room, away from all the lights and noise and chaos when he felt a hand on his shoulder. Turning round he saw David looking at him with concerned eyes, "Are you alright? You're really pale."

Breathing out slowly Kurt replied, "Fine, just tired, first day back and all."

David nodded his head in understanding, "It's always hard to come back. C'mon, you decided what you want and we'll go and join the rest of the Warblers."

Kurt grabbed some salad and pasta while David waited for him having already got his food and they walked over to the Warbler table together. They took the only two free seats at the table and Kurt was relieved to find he was at the opposite end from Blaine.

Spearing a piece of pasta on his fork Kurt struggled to bring it to his mouth. His body screamed '_I'm hungry'_ but at the same time he felt a lead weight sitting in his stomach. He got the pasta in his mouth and mechanically chewed as he struggled to stop tears forming. Swallowing hard several times he looked up to see David watching him with concerned eyes.

"Are you sure you're OK?" he asked.

"Fine, I just forgot to get a drink, back in a moment." Kurt jumped up and walked quickly across to the fridge. Pulling the door open and relishing the cool air he stood for a moment as if trying to decide. Knowing it would look strange if he took much longer Kurt grabbed a bottle of water and closing the door turned to find himself face to face with his boyfriend.

"I'm really glad to see you've come down. I was getting really concerned when you didn't reply to my texts."

"_Sorry, I had some music on and didn't hear the phone. I did however finish all my French homework so that's only another 6 subjects to catch up on!" _Kurt said with a grin.

"So does that mean you might have some free time for me this weekend after all?" the shorter boy said with a wink.

"Mmm, I think I may manage that, did you have something in mind?"secretly loving Blaine in flirty mode.

"Well how about you come to my room at 8 and we'll figure something out," Blaine planted a quick kiss on Kurt's cheek and whispered. "Right now I have a date with calculus and you need to go finish your dinner."

Walking back to the table much happier Kurt sat down grinning and took a long drink of water. At the sound of laughter he looked up to see Wes and David giggling at him. "What?"

"_Nothing, just you and Blaine are too cute."_ Said Wes with a grin. _"I'm glad you've made up, he was really upset this afternoon."_

Kurt immediately felt panic rising, "Why, what did he say?"

"Don't look so worried, he didn't really say anything, just that you'd had an argument."

"Oh, well we're over it now." Kurt said and picked up his fork to eat. He managed about half the salad and a few more pieces of pasta before he felt the nausea taking over again. He looked round and saw that half the table was empty by this point and those that were still there were not paying any attention to him. Released of the pressure of anyone paying attention to how much he ate Kurt cleared his tray and made his way back to the dorm, if he was really focussed he might manage to finish the English essay he had started on Monday evening before he went to see Blaine.

…...

Kurt did manage to finish the English essay and was quite pleased to have got the first section of a history essay started before he felt the need to stop. Looking over at the clock on his night stand he realised it was already 8.15 and he was late to meet Blaine. Grabbing his keys and phone he quickly made his way down the corridor and knocked on the dark brown door.

"I was starting to think you were going to stand me up," Blaine exclaimed grabbing Kurt's hand as he pulled him through the door. Tugging sharply on his hand he led the younger boy over to his bed and they were soon involved in a battle of tongues both urgently needing the other. Blaine began to run his fingers slowly over Kurt's arm and back before pushing his hands under his T-shirt looking quickly at Kurt for permission. With a quick nod from the blue eyed boy Blaine pulled his t-shirt off and began touching and kissing all over his chest and stomach searching for answers, reassurance that everything was fine between them.

Soon both boys were left breathless and red faced, shirts abandoned on the floor. All arguments forgotten, just the desperate need to be near each other fulfilled. Blaine reached forward to unbuckle the buttons on Kurt's jeans but as he did the pale boy pulled his hand up and kissed it instead. "Sorry but much as I want to I don't really have the energy for anything more tonight."

"Oh, yes, I'm so sorry. I wasn't thinking. I really don't want you sick again…" Kurt cut off the dark haired boy with a slow deep kiss.

"Stop apologising, I just thought it would be better to cool off now"

Laughing easily Blaine reached down and picked up Kurt's t-shirt, "Here, don't want you getting cold either. How about a movie?"

Blaine got himself dressed as well and then popped a DVD in his laptop. The two boys got themselves settled, snuggled up together under Blaine's comforter and slowly drifted off while the movie played on. Woken just before curfew by the alarm which Blaine had thoughtfully set on his phone they exchanged a few gentle kisses before Kurt made his way back to his room.

Having thought about it overnight Kurt had worked out the perfect plan. He slept late on Saturday morning (which was totally understandable as it was the weekend) worked on assignments in the morning, went late to lunch to avoid having to sit near Blaine, worked more in the afternoon, went late to dinner and then spent the evening with Blaine in his room not watching movies.

On Sunday Kurt planned to do exactly the same, as long as Blaine saw him at meals everything would be fine and it was until five minutes before the start of dinner when Blaine knocked on his door.

"Ready for dinner?" Blaine said almost bouncing on the spot.

"Have you overdone the caffeine again?"Kurt asked cautiously, his boyfriend was being way to hyper.

"No, I just haven't spent much time with you so thought I'd come and get you."

"Thanks but I just want to finish off my history essay and then I'll come down OK"and with that Kurt went to close the door. Blaine put his foot in the way and made his way into the room.

"It's OK, I'll wait."

"But I could be a while, you'll miss catching up with the other guys."

"Kurt, I'm not interested in speaking to any of the others. Besides I saw them at lunch and dinner yesterday and lunch today, I'm pretty sure no one is going to have anything earth shattering to share. The only person I want to talk to is you."

Kurt laughed, just a little too loudly making it sound fake, "But you'll miss all the good food, you might have to eat salad!"

"Then I'll be in good company with you. C'mon, get working, sooner you start the sooner you finish," and with that the Warbler sat down on Kurt's bed and pulled out an old edition of Vogue to look through, making himself comfortable.

Kurt had no option but to sit back at his desk and at least pretend to work on his essay. His stomach was knotted and he could feel himself sweating at the thought of having to force food down. He could feel the now familiar flare of anger building up too but breathing deeply he managed to keep from yelling at his beautiful boyfriend who hadn't actually done anything wrong.

Noticing that Kurt hadn't written anything for a few minutes Blaine spoke up, "Do you need some help?"

"No, I'm just thinking how to phrase my conclusion."Then Kurt thought back to something Blaine said earlier that might make him go over to the dining room early. "What makes you think I've got anything interesting to say at dinner?"

"What?"

"You said earlier that you've spoken to the other Warblers over the weekend so you don't want to have dinner with them tonight but you spent Friday and Saturday evening with me. I don't have anything 'new or earth shattering' to share either."

"What on earth are you talking about?" Blaine asked perplexed.

"Well if none of us have anything to talk about then why don't you go over and have dinner now and I'll join you later when I've finished this. That way you don't have to eat rabbit food, there will be pizza or lasagne left."

"Kurt," said Blaine talking slowly, "you are my boyfriend and I want to go to dinner with you. I don't mind eating salad if there's nothing else, I just don't want it everyday. Yes we have been together both evenings but we haven't exactly been talking, you've been working loads and somehow we've ended up at other ends of the table in the dining hall for every meal this weekend so in reality I feel like I've barely seen you."

Realising this conversation was going nowhere (and the reality that he hadn't a clue how to finish his essay also dawning on him) Kurt stood up and grabbed Blaine's hand, "C'mon then, let's get some dinner."

It was fine, really it was, all he had to do was eat. He'd been doing it since he was a little baby, it was easy. Only somehow it wasn't that easy, the vegetables on his plate were actually laughing at him, the chicken was dancing around and just daring him to put it in his mouth and he was pretty sure the pasta salad was saying nasty things about him. He would teach that pasta a lesson if he could just….

"Kurt….Kurt?"

There was a voice which didn't seem to be coming from his plate and lifting his gaze he found himself looking right into the concerned eyes of his boyfriend.

"Are you planning on eating your dinner or attacking it?" Blaine said with a smile. "You're just stabbing at the plate."

Blushing furiously Kurt picked up his fork and began to eat trying to ignore the gentle laughing from beside him.

"So anyway, how is your make up work going? You've been working so hard you must be almost caught up."

"It's OK, the chemistry is pretty difficult though, I missed the beginning of a new topic and I'm not really sure what I'm supposed to do."

"Isn't Nick in your class? Maybe he could help you or David took it last year if you'd prefer him."

Putting down his fork Kurt considered his options. "I'll ask Nick, maybe I can catch him when he gets back and he can give me a few pointers tonight." Standing up Kurt went to clear his tray when Blaine grabbed his arm.

"Woah, there's no rush, you can finish your dinner."

"I am finished."

"But you've barely eaten anything. Nick's not going to be back for at least an hour, you've got plenty of time."

"I said I'm finished." Kurt hissed with more irritation than anything else and grabbed his tray before Blaine had a chance to comment.

Watching the back of the taller boy as he stormed away Blaine was again left confused. As he cleared his own dishes and wandered back to his dorm he tried to work out what had happened, what had been going on all weekend.

In reality Blaine had been going to suggest they go into town to eat, possibly the new pizza restaurant that Wes was raving about. However when Kurt had reacted so strangely to him arriving in his dorm for dinner he immediately decided to shelf that plan. He couldn't fathom what was going on with the younger boy. One minute he was freaking out about nothing and the next they were locked in an intense game of tonsil tennis!

He could understand that Kurt had been tired and overwhelmed on Friday but he had seemed fine at meals on Saturday from what Blaine could see and certainly he had been in good form on Saturday evening. Deciding that Kurt was just putting too much pressure on himself to get caught up Blaine sent him a quick text and went back to his dorm.

**Sorry I upset you. I'll be in my room all evening if you fancy a movie or want to talk or something. B x**

A few minutes later the reply came,

**Thanks but I think I need an early night. K x**

**OK, I'm here if you change your mind.**

Knowing that nothing was going to be resolved that evening, in fact was there anything to be resolved, Blaine grabbed one of his favourite Disney movies and curled up on his bed.

Kurt lay curled up on his bed too, clutching his stomach as fresh tears rolled down his cheeks. He was sure he must be having a panic attack because surely breathing shouldn't feel this hard. He felt so hopeless and useless and a million other feelings he had and he was sure Blaine must hate him for storming out and he was never going to catch up on all this work and they were going to kick him out of Dalton and his dad would be so disappointed and he would have to go back to McKinley where Karowsky was just waiting for him and just everything was wrong. Somehow the gentle tears trickling down his cheeks turned into gigantic sobs which he could no longer control and despite everything he had gone through Kurt Hummel had never felt so worthless in his entire life.


	6. Chapter 6

**Finally an update! I know it ends abruptly but the next chapter is almost finished and if I don't this one here then the next will be too long. Enjoy and review – do you like the direction it's going? Oh and if you have time check out Lisamarie22's story, The New Kid ( s/9781224/1/The-New-Kid) which is one of the best stories on this theme that I've read (and she is still updating it).**

He had just finished tying the laces on his black school shoes when there was a knock at the door and he didn't need to have x-ray vision to know it was Blaine. Opening the door and moving aside so he could enter Kurt couldn't help but notice the hesitation with which the dark haired boy entered the room.

Busying himself packing his books for the day he was surprised to feel two strong arms round his waist and a cheek brushing next to his.

"I'm sorry if I've been overbearing the last few days. I just hate to see you so miserable and working so hard. Your beautiful face gets all scrunched up and I just want to make it all better," Kurt turned and reciprocated the hug, burying his face on Blaine's shoulder.

"It's fine, last week was just a weird week for both of us."

Planting a kiss on Kurt's forehead, Blaine took his hand and led him from the dorm, "C'mon then, let's get this week off to a better start."

…..

Entering the dining room the boys were immediately surrounded by the commotion and sleepiness that indicated Monday morning. Splitting up so they could get their own breakfasts Kurt had never been happier that he usually ate healthily anyway. He had a plan to put in action to keep control of eating, the fear of eating too much and feeling full had been stressing him out but it would be much harder if he had to explain his changing habits to the other students and especially to Blaine.

Taking his time to grab a few items and a quick discussion with Andy about that horrendous and pointless assignment for Politics class he made his way over to the Warbler's table. There was a seat free next to Blaine but as the table was almost full he assumed someone had gone to get another drink or something. As he went to sit down next to Thad at the other end from Blaine he heard him call, "Kurt, I've got a seat for you here."

"Thanks."

"You were taking a while and I didn't want us to end up at opposite ends like we did over the weekend." With that Blaine turned back to his breakfast resting one hand gently on Kurt's knee.

At least sitting next to Blaine had the advantage that Nick and Jeff were on his other side. Kurt always enjoyed talking to them, either together or separately and soon he and Nick were discussing plans to go and see the new action film coming out, Jeff had made it very clear he had no interest in seeing it. As they talked Kurt carefully chopped the fruit in his fruit salad into small pieces and cut his slice of toast into eight small triangles before beginning to eat. He ate one piece of fruit and then chatted for a bit more, then a piece of toast before talking again. He continued this pattern mildly aware of Blaine watching him curiously periodically.

Blaine and Jeff changed the conversation and there was a great discussion between the four of them about trying the new Chinese restaurant that night, just going for coffee and having dinner back at school or just staying at school and continuing to finish homework (Kurt's suggestion). As the warning bell rang Kurt looked down to check his plate and was pleased that he had only eaten about half of what he had. Standing up to clear his tray he saw Blaine smile at him as he stood too. Warm fingers slipped around his colder ones and the two boys walked out of the dining hall happily but for different reasons.

Blaine had been concerned about going to breakfast in case Kurt was still being strange but as soon as he had arrived in his dorm room everything felt better, almost normal. There had been no suggestions to go ahead without him, Kurt had willing returned Blaine's affection and gone to the dining hall. Granted Kurt had taken a long time to get his food and had gone to sit at the other end of the table but he hadn't refused to sit with Blaine when he called him. Blaine knew that Kurt had only eaten a small amount but that was understandable, almost a week barely eating would do that. Blaine walked to his first class feeling more relaxed than he had for the last few days, happy that everything was back on track.

…..

Kurt set a pattern over the next few days which seemed to be working well for him. He didn't seek Blaine out at mealtimes but didn't hide away from him either. He took small amounts of food, cut it small and then ate half, or if he could manage it even less. He would play around with the food and mix it up so it looked like he had eaten more than he had in reality although he knew no one was really paying attention. Having done a little research he knew it was important to drink regularly to avoid dehydration.

He was learning how to balance how much he needed to eat and more importantly drink so that the gnaw of hunger was always present but not enough to make him actually feel ill. He also got a huge thrill seeing how much food he could resist leaving on his plate, cutting it up into tiny pieces, swirling it all together to disguise how much was left. This balancing game, as Kurt saw it, gave him a new challenge, a goal for each day and he was loving it in a bizarre way. His secret contest with himself where the only prize was feeling great when he lay in bed each night and reviewed his progress. As he headed home for the weekend Kurt felt happier than he had in weeks.

….

"Hi, how was your weekend?" the gelled dark haired singer popped his head around the dorm door as he came back from dinner on Sunday evening.

"Great, it was just what I needed. I hung out with the girls a lot, played some computer games with Finn and Puck and thanks to David's tutoring I managed to finish all my chemistry homework with only minimal swearing!"

"Sounds great," Blaine murmured as he wrapped himself around Kurt moving them both over to the bed. "I missed you though, Wes and David were away too and I think I may have overdosed on the insanity that is Niff!"

"Oh poor baby, let me make it all better," and with that Kurt began placing feather kisses all over Blaine's face and neck before sucking hard at the join between his collar bone and neck. Certainly not complaining at this Blaine moved Kurt so he was lying on the bed with the tenor on top and began to return the favour.

Their actions were interrupted by Blaine's phone blaring a tune, "Um, just a minute," he muttered, clearly annoyed. "Yeah….. OK… I'll ask….whatever!" Laughing at the confusion on Kurt's face Blaine explained, "That was David, he and Wes are back and wondered if we wanted to go and watch a movie with them in the common room. We don't have to, we can just hang out here if you want."

"No, it's fine. We can go and join them."

Reaching the common room Kurt quickly realised that Jeff and Nick were also there as well as Cameron, one of the Warblers that he was quite friendly with. Blaine went off to get a soda while David set up the movie and Kurt sat down at a table near the back with Cameron to catch up as he hadn't seen him over the previous week.

They were both laughing over Cameron's failed attempt to avoid working with Thad for a geography presentation when Blaine approached them. "Are you coming to watch the film?"

"Yeh, sorry. Cameron, are you joining us?"

"No, sorry but I've got to finish an English essay but maybe we could do something later this week."

With a quick hug Kurt made his way over to the sofa to join Blaine and Cameron headed off to his dorm. Blaine quickly threw his arm around Kurt's shoulders and pulled him close. "You see, this is what I've missed all weekend!"

"Well you could have asked, I'm sure Jeff or Nick would have happily snuggled," Kurt giggled, planting a kiss firmly on his lips.

"Cheeky," was all Blaine could manage in response before taking a deep breath and turning back to the film.


End file.
